I kept getting phone calls from the NY Blood Center that there was a blood drive coming up today. So finally I told them 'ok I'll probably go.' Then I got home today and almost forgot and I wasn't sure if I should go. But I was starting to feel that feeling that I felt on Friday right before I left for youth which led me to a divine appointment, the same one that I felt right before I left fellowship for the city for a night with friends which first led me to a divine appointment. I've felt that feeling often so I HAD to go and it HAD to be then. Every so often I stopped for things - I stopped to give a kiss to a sister in Christ (divine appointment #1). I stopped to give a guy directions (divine appointment #2). I stopped to look in a few grocery / fruit & veggie stores for honey dew (didn't find it but it wasn't an emergency - but it WAS part of God's PERFECT timing). I finally got to the blood bus and they said I was the last one before they took a break. I was really tempted to let the lady after me go first but God was like "No. I know you want to be nice, but you are here for this moment for a purpose. Let them take you first." And I was thinking, "Ok I guess somebody needs this blood. Thank You God that I can give this blood to someone who needs it. Thank You for healing me and keeping me so I can be healthy enough to donate...." And I'm figuring that's why God had me there. And I was even getting antsy kuz I wanted to get home to my family (my nephew was over) and I felt bad I wouldnt be able to hold him but I just KNEW there was something. Then as I'm sitting having a snack and I look over at the driver. He's reading a magazine. And I'm like: What if he were reading like "The Battlefield of the Mind?" If he was a Christian it would be perfect for him to have this job kuz he could just read aaallll day... And then I was like: I should tell him "Jesus loves you" and then run and leave lol. I started thinking a few things: 1) What if I'm in the flesh and I just want to tell people just ... idk just to tell them. But I realized, even if that is the case, what's the harm, really, in telling people Jesus loves them. 2) Why is it so stinking hard for me/us Christians to tell people about Jesus. If we truly believe what we claim to believe, shouldn't we be shouting it from the rooftops and not caring if anyone thinks we're crazy??? I know Jesus loves me and I know that He loved that guy and I know that He is healer and friend.... I started feeling the same feeling that led me there in the first place. And I started laughing to myself (and trying to catch my breath - even wondering if this was a reaction to the blood draw lol) and asking God "um....was this why you wanted me to donate and at this time?" So I started looking at the time and saying: I have to leave around 6:02 (I had to stay there for about ten minutes). So I'm like: "Ok. A few more minutes, then I'll get up, turn around as I get to the store and I guess tell the guy...." And then he gets up and leaves. And I start freaking out that I'm gonna miss my chance but I was also glad kuz I was like: He's probably just outside taking a break/smoking a cigarette or something (he wasnt smoking btw). So I go outside (it was almost 6:02. 6pm to be exact if I'm not mistaken) and I look for him and then I see him and I say "Jesus loves you." And he didn't hear me so he asked what I said so I said, "I said Jesus loves you." And I think he said something else like that u or smthg and I said "just don't forget that ok? He loves you." We were walking the same direction. I was omw to the train and he said he was taking down the signs kuz the blood drive was over, they just took their last donor. And then he said, "Well I hope He loves me kuz nobody else does." I said, "Yeah people may treat you like crap but Jesus is right there waiting for u" or smthg to that affect. Then he said, "I hope He loves you too" or "He loves you too" and I'm like: "I know He does. That's why I'm able to tell you that He loves you too." And he said God bless you and I left rejoicing and humbled.
People, do we not know what the Lord has placed in us? That if we listen to and obey His voice He will use us as vessels. Kuz yes God speaks in many ways and God is everywhere but He needs a voice to speak through and feet to walk with and hands to use. We don't know what people are going through and sometimes it seems so cliche to say "Jesus loves you" or it seems silly or whatever but you know what - what would've happened if I hadn't told that guy about Jesus. I had no idea he needed that. That could've changed his life. That could've been the only love that he's received recently or will receive for a while or ever. That could've been the straw that broke the camel's back (or this man's heart) and opened him up to receive Jesus, hope, salvation!
It just broke my heart in a way because I know how it feels to feel unloved or unlovable and yet.....I know what God has done for me....even though I forget sometimes or I can't quite grasp it.......
People, we may be going through things but we know who Jesus is, right? And it's not even about us. It's about God in us and it's about others. And there are people who maybe need the reminder more than we do or maybe never knew and it's just amazing and humbling and a lil scary to think that we can be used by God to minister life to them. There is a dying world out there and we have the gift of life - through Jesus Christ, of course.
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